How Writing Gave My Music Breathing Room
If you open up the windows
And if you open up the doors
You will see
Yes, you will see
-Living Room by Abbey Lincoln
One of the best things about writing my first book was that I put soooo much less pressure on myself than with music. I didn’t have a trillion dos and donts, shoulds and shouldnts, or general desires to wow the crowd. I felt calm, hopeful, and inspired with a hint of “I’m not too bad at this”. The only other times I really purposely surrounded myself with writers was at Oberlin when I started a creative writing group with a bunch of other students (that included author and now MacArthur awardee Kiese Laymon) and again after college when I co-created an intimate writing circle with authors hattie gossett and Madeline Murray. But I didn’t choose to major in writing, I didn’t believe I was supposed to be an amazing writer when I was in kindergarten, and I didn’t impress people with my writing in high school. So somehow writing became this kind of free zone. Free to be me with a lot less self-judgment. Who would like some of that??
For some people writing holds immense pressure and I get it! I mean Toni Morrison…Need I say more? Talk about intimidating. Toni Morrison and James Baldwin became some of my favorite writers early on. I used to read James Baldwin in high school and almost cry at the perfection and craft in how he put together a sentence. ( I still feel that way). But I never put myself in the Baldwin/Morrison camp. I was a music kid. Always and forever. So I was in the Sarah Vaughn, Chaka Kahn, Jimi Hendrix, Sade, Prince camp. And that’s a pretty heavy camp too!
But it was OH so liberating to remove or put on another art identity a few years ago. I didn’t realize how badly I needed it and what trouble it would actually get me out of. As I mentioned last week on my podcast in conversation with Nikki Starcat Shields, writing a book really allowed me to lift the lid and gift myself more room, or freedom, in my music making process. One of the things I also loved which Shields emphasizes in her writing programs is that there are two ways to learn writing. You can study writing by taking classes about it or you can study writing by just writing. If you haven’t yet listened to this conversation, I urge you to take a listen here.
What about you? Are you wanting some more living room in your music making practice? Send me a reply. I would love to hear from you.